Current and archived curated/annotated News in Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID), or Multiple Personality Disorder (MPD) as collected daily from Google Search utilizing Diigo and by visiting blogs of other people who are also multiples.
--- by Ann M Garvey --- Anns are dissociative and believe being dissociative is something that should be treated respectfully.
Mind Mapping - the NEWS (slowly - work in process)
Tuesday, November 5, 2013
NEWS Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID)/ Multiple Personality Disorder (MPD) for week ending October 27, 2013 - News Annotations from Google Searches
All day today, the Two Rivers Behavioral Health System in Kansas City, Missouri, will host their 2013 Trauma Symposium.
The conference is intended as a gathering of knowledgeable experts in mental health willing to share new tools and strategies to help victims of trauma. Its speakers will include trained Two Rivers staff and psychiatrist Chris Trueblood. And oh yeah, it’ll also feature a man who believes he was abused by a government-sanctioned cult of Satanists who raised him to become the Antichrist.
David Shurter is a man of many stories. Chief among them is the tale that he, among others, was prey to a group of politically powerful cultists who brainwashed him into acts of cannibalism, murder and deviant acts of sex. To drop the hammer further, his own parents were high-ranking members of the cult. They in turn held close ties to the CIA’s clandestine MKUltra program, a program that was – depending on who you ask – either a spectacular failure by the government to prove claims of psychic ability, or the very successful indoctrination of young men and women programmed to activate later as sleeper agents.
To read Shutter’s descriptions of his life, either on his blog or through his autobiography, Rabbit Hole – a Satanic Ritual Abuse Survivor’s Story (Now available on Amazon!), is to stare deeply into the heart of delusion. And it’s not an experience I wholeheartedly recommend.
Suffice to say, Shurter considers himself and a few select others to be the flagbearers of an unspoken truth: the rampant victimization of young children by a underground network of Satanists versed in cruelty, sadism, and most importantly, mind control. Mind control that enabled Satanic abusers to repress the heinous acts done to their victims, at least until later on in life.
For those of us tuned in, this might sound remarkably similar to claims made in the 80′s and 90′s by concerned parents, law enforcement officials and therapists. And that’s because it is.
The so-called “Satanic Panic” took hold of the public imagination for the better part of a decade as criminal prosecutions, heartbreaking TV specials and autobiographic novels all held fast the idea that Satanists were destroying young children across the nation. Eventually, as later investigations found nothing but the incompetence of law officials and unreliable testimonies, the movement to expose the hidden underbelly of cult activity mostly came to an embarrassing end by the early part of the 90′s. Obviously, some folks stuck around.
Nowadays, Shurter and his ilk receive most of their attention from a fringe and entirely online network of conspiracy theorists, labeling themselves as survivors of Satanic Ritual Abuse (SRA). While you could spend entire books trying to decipher the mentality of these community members (Lord knows people have), the most honest thing to say about them is that the experiences they collectively describe are no less painful or traumatic than anyone else’s. That doesn’t make their claims any more real, mind you.
And were it to remain within the community, there probably wouldn’t be a need to write about them, or Shurter, at all, except perhaps as intellectual curiosity.*
But the Two Rivers Behavioral Health Systems isn’t an online forum of SRA survivors, now is it? It’s a long-standing mental health facility in the heartland of the country, with trained professionals and an obligation to provide the best possible care to its patients. An obligation I can’t see fulfilled by hosting an academic conference and handing off the stage to a man who believes he was brainwashed to become the world’s finest Satanic assassin.
Given that Two Rivers is specifically presenting Shurter as a ritual abuse survivor, it would appear they’re fully aware of and endorse his claims, and that is positively frightening in its implications. The SRA movement would have never reached the apex it did without the continued prodding by mental health professionals who recovered memories of Satanic abuse and went on to defend their tactics in courtrooms, books and in the media. To see this continue in 2013 is beyond appalling.
Adding salt to the wound, the conference will provide five shiny Continuing Education credits to all its attendees. Just in case you were worried about people not being motivated to show up.
The story sadly doesn’t end here.
See, once upon a time, Two Rivers Behavioral Health System was called Two Rivers Psychiatric Hospital. And for the better part of the 90′s, it played host to the Masters & Johnson Trauma Unit, founded and ran by a psychologist named Mark F. Schwartz. The same Mark F. Schwartz who would go on to build the Castlewood Treatment Center in St. Louis alongside spouse Lori Galperin. Schwartz is currently facing civil litigation over claims that he personally coerced at least two women into believing…wait for it…that they were victimized by Satanic cultists.**
*Writing about Shurter is something I’m wary about in general as he is known to obsess over and harass anyone critical of his views, painting them as accomplices to the Satanic conspiracy.
**During my investigation of Castlewood this time last year, I personally reached out to the HR department of Two Rivers. They assured me that while they were aware of Schwartz’s previous tenure there, Two Rivers had no affilation with either him or Castlewood. Hmm.
I recently had a "fugue"ish episode and soon afterwards I feel like I had a system "Crash" where this system was comprised of lego blocks all of different colors, the colors representing different emotions and identities.
I dont' know where they went in the first place and they've been all kind of popping up trying to refind their place. Now I've managed to identify one of the blocks who, thanks to the users on this board has been clearly cut out as an entity.
So this morning I woke up with an even brighter sense of clarity into this new entity that i've discovered. he's always been there but has been knocking on my door SO MUCH lately. "Forcing me to sleep on the couch etc."Now I'm beginning to understand why.
My life during that period was constantly surrounded by fear and death. I remember being in a sort of "Diversion Program" for juveniles because of my behavior and fighting in middle school, roughly around 12 or 13 which showed many videos of people getting beaten and rape stories in prison. After this, I had a fear of the world, so much to the point that I would lean the car seat back and duck when looking out the window whenever i saw someone that resembled these videos.
I was at a certain friends house and started to become immersed in "ghetto" culture where people would come over to see his older sister and always be telling stories about holding guns or how they were going to get robbed etc etc. I began to sort of "manifest" this reality and was terrified of it.
I then got sent to an alternative schooling program where everyone there was some sort of gang member or somehow involved in gang member culture. It was a "rehabilitation" school This is when i believe he began to come out. I remember seeing him from the outside at this point, one eye a little cocked, he spoke my words for me and intimidated some of the people at the school. Just enough to the point of where they would leave him alone.
It begins again when one of the students at that school was shot and killed over a video game disagreement in an internet cafe. Just one block from the school. Black hole again.
I am now back in the brightly lit nice neighborhood I got kicked out of when I was a juvenile. This is when I started to walk up to people I may or may not have been in an altercation with like nothing happened and be normal. I completely forgot my middle school years at that point.Everyone at that school started to grow a slow but growing dislike for me. I felt very rejected. It's almost as if i was "known" at that school but I myself was completely oblivious to it. Now that I can think of that time, many people were asking me the similar questions during that period of my life.
I began to find items around the house I didn't recognize but assumed were there and it made sense at the time somehow. These items were knives, some sort of pool cue, etc. etc. Now I understand that they were his. He was always the one holding something at the ready. Cleaning up after me. Now I understand why he was so mad.
Eg. 1 : I was both bullied and the bully in middle school.
However, at that time, I completely blocked out that I was even fighting in middle school.
I don't know if it's me reading about DID, being able to identify with it and freaking out that I can actually feel an alter now, and feeling helpless to it. (Did you guys freak out at first as well?, does the anxiety of this ever go away?) I have these inner panic attacks that don't affect my outer body, but i definately do feel them. Coupled with the headache. I think it's mostly because I'm scared of what my other alter is capable of rather than what it's "Up To" which I wish it really was.
I believe I recently had a fugue, however i'm still waiting on the memories to come back. I don't believe it was a full fugue because I still have some memories of it. Just can't make any sense out of it.
Basically, what it feels like now after the "fugue" is that before this crash I was made up of lego blocks, all of different colors, the colors representing different parts of me and my life. Suddenly this lego thing was thrown at wall and the pieces are all over the place. I can't put them back together correctly because I didn't know where their proper place was in the first place and I can't find them all, but what I did find was that I was made out of lego blocks if that makes any sense. Which leads to endless "black hole" headaches and a very "carousel" like feeling spinning in my head. Just jumping all over the place in my life.
I guess what this boils down to is when you guys found out you were or suspected you had DID. (Which i'm still not fully sure of) and started reading about it, did you have similar symptoms?Did it get better over time or was it better before you ever figured it out.
THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, this is Kenzi Viser from The Biggest Little City In The World A.K.A Reno, Nevada. She is a very confused soul… Sometimes she is a ghetto black chick, sometimes she the whitest girl in Starbucks, sometimes she’s a alleged tattoo model, sometimes she doesn’t know who she is.
A few years ago, she moved out of Reno due as an attempt to escape the scrutiny and ridicule of everyone after she was exposed for being a homie hoppin, home wrecking whore! This girl has well over 30 confirmed bodies in her. She was married but couldn’t keep them dark ass chocolate logs closed. All she does is post online about stacking paper, going to medical school and how she’s getting signed to a major tattoo modeling agency.
She can’t keep her story straight with anyone because all she does is lie about every single aspect of her life. She acts as if she’s some ultra religious god fearing woman, but then minutes lAter she’s talking about getting turnt up. Spending one day with her is like hanging with Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. She’s calm one minute, snapping out the next, and then you never know what you’re going to get with her multiple personality disorder. Nik, please help.
actualy i started watching ipkknd ebp recently and became a fan of it and while watching older episodes i think sloke is having multiple personality disorder.
during that kolapur episodes in a single shot he bocomes mesmerised by her beauty, attracted by her innocence while talking to her baba in phone and suddenly gets angry... he is scared when she is close to him or when she care him... and i think finally sloke made his fear his weapon... go closer to her...
avinash is really a talented actor who looks goood in all emotions chahe anger ho,romance ho ya kuch bhi...sreenu is also too good..
There are times that Apple, which is famous for presenting a single unified face to the world, seems to suffer from a multiple personality disorder.
Case in point — if you have an older Mac and want to upgrade to OS X 10.7 Lion or 10.8 Mountain Lion, even after the release of 10.9 Mavericks (see “Apple Releases OS X 10.9 Mavericks for Free,” 22 October 2013), Apple will sell you a $19.99 redemption code via the Apple Online Store, which you then redeem in the Mac App Store. This roundabout approach is necessary because Apple keeps only the latest version of Mac OS X — now Mavericks — visible in the Mac App Store, presumably to prevent customer confusion.
Ok I’m sorry but fuck it. I am fucking sick and fucking tired of fucking DID. Now, someone has lost the fucking binder. The one thing that us boys really love and need when in this fucking body. I have been dressing as a fucking girl all week but today I can be my fucking self, right? Wrong. Because they’ve lost the fucking binder and I can’t find it anywhere.
Max, I’d like to point some things out so that, when you come back and have calmed down, you can see how this was just said in anger.
You didn’t find the binder, Amber did.
Though she lost the binder, she then tidied the room to find it.
It was underneath something you had dumped, not her.
If it hadn’t have been for Amber, you never would have found it.
I’ve put it on for you (along with your favourite iron man t-shirt).
We’re only here to help each other, we’d never intentionally do something with the purpose of hurting your feelings.
We care about you, Max.
DID doesn’t have to be a bad thing, I’ve found that it can often provide that little helping hand that you need. even when things get bad (worse than a missing binder) you should always remember that you have the rest of your system to fall back on.
Ayo whaddup. Im like, on the verge of destruction and enlightened wisdom n bliss. I love being different with my D.I.D, I love whats happening to me, the courage n growth, my fucken wicked relationship with TRUTH!! As I go along living as a non liar in all aspects of my life, i gain more and more power, insight, scope....woohoo.k to be continued...
Wow! I'm glad I'm not alone at this feeling.I also have that weird awareness of time moving through me.One time I got to see it and it did help this mind understand the concept.
*trigger warning*The first time I tried Salvia ( a few months ago)By the way I'm not saying anyone should try. Just sharing what I experienced:I wrote on my diary this so I could remember.(I've learn to write as some times I have no recollection of what an alter feels or thinks)
With eyes closed I can see patterns of lilac and pink, swirls flowing on spirals to the beat of the music in my ipod I was feeling something peaceful, languid and calm, except for a heightened feeling of my skin, where I thought the carpet fibers where too sharp and prickly. This feeling went away and I totally lost time/space notion and begun staring at a great amount of brightly colored cards standing one behind each other on the manner of domino pieces. There was neon orange, yellow, green and purple mixing and mingling.The singing on my ipod marked the beat and movement of the cards that danced in patterns formations, swirling.
I found myself in another world. Suddenly I wasn't just watching the cards but I was part of them or I was them and started questioning if this was reality rather than my life as I know it
The cards where those who live inside me and the shell or body as the big RolodexThe passing and moving like time and reality. So relativeWas priceless to watch from the shell, each and every card and the outside simultaneously.
Until recently I've been trying to understand the other parts in me that I have split from.I have made no attempt to understand myself though. In fact I have no sense of self at all.
As a child I identified with my mum and dad, despite the terrible things they did, I thought they were great. It got to the point could not console myself, and the conflict between my love for them and their treatment of me. After a particular experience, my only strategy was to disidentify from myself, to disown and seperate myself.
Anyhow... What's this post about? Well - I have found it extremely helpful to digest experiences like these, the split from another self, as a product of my own experience rather than as someone else's experience.
It's almost ironic - all this time I've been worried about listening to and understanding my other selves - actually I can understand them much better now for having explored my own self (or lack thereof).
I dunno if this makes sense to any of you at all Anyhow thanks for reading
I don't know how many of you have had this experience, but one of my alters, Agnes, is extremely violent. So occasionally instead of sending my boyfriend a cute, friendly text Agnes will send a really hateful death threat. As you can imagine this is not only quite awkward but also really scary. In other situations, he and I will be kissing and all of a sudden Janet, who is a child, will come out and start crying.
He says he doesn't mind and that he loves all my "broken parts" but I wonder when the day will come when it all gets too bizarre or I get too weird for him to handle.
Relationships are difficult enough without having experiences like these. I sometimes wonder if I will ever be able to share myself with another person when I am already sharing myself with so many?
The more I discover. The more I uncover... Combined. It feels like I have already lived more than a lifetime. And I'm about to expire. I'm proud of the team who I became. Who became me. Not perfect. Not happy. But... Still going on. I forget how hard it was. How hard it is. I have to forget. I have to go to sleep... But I'm afraid to go to sleep.
What if I don't wake up? Or worse... What if I don't want to? What if I collapse, just before the finish line? What if... there is no finish line?.. Am I chasing ghosts? Am I, myself... the ghost I am chasing?
Sorry for the depressiveness and the dramatic style of the text above, but it seemed more natural (and more meaningful, I assume) to express this feeling of sadness from the point of view of the one who feels it. I was wondering if it was myself, if I was really able to feel sadness, which I'm still not entirely sure about. But I'm afraid that the words above have little meaning to me.
I can observe the signs in my body, but I don't really know what it is like to feel tired. I don't know what it is like to feel sad. I go to sleep because I know my body requires sleep. And I feel incomplete because of this (I suppose incompleteness is the only feeling I can genuinely experience).
Does anyone else experience this feeling of being tired because of all the lives you have lived — and because of the one life you haven't lived yet? How do you cope with it?
2 Day's ago Ms Nickie (alter) started going crazy w/her conspiracy theory that there were ppl there she couldn't read and she can read everyone and so after locking everyone out expect one person I find out that the systems that I knew about are not alone.
My hubby has 7 systems total! For me that's a big deal because they say that's why he's been hearing voices even though he asks everyone to be quiet, and they do, but he still hears talking. So it comes from the other systems which in a way is a wonderful thing but on the other hand it means more ppl for him and I to meet.Does anyone else have more than 2 systems and if so how many?
Hi Simply Monet - multiple systems do occur and I'm not sure how common though. I have two systems that were not co conscious of each other until recently and my system is fairly simple compared to what I see on this board. The more abuse the more need for alters and alter systems I guess? I have a friend who has maybe 5 systems with subsystems, very elaborate compared to mine.
Maybe someone who knows more will comment otherwise try searching in the forum- best of luck in learning about your husband's system .
I've been doing a lot of lurking lately and can relate with SO MANY experiences that other people are having here. It's a very very comforting feeling.
I've always searched for disorders myself because I knew SOMETHING was wrong, but always avoided finding help because I was scared to be labeled as a crazy, and was in denial, and often times just completely oblivious to it. (I'm sure you guys can relate to that as well) but I never found any clear answers until recently. It was always "oh maybe i'm kind of this... or a little that, but nothing explained The time distortions, flashbacks, unexplainable emotions that come out of nowhere, the constant "inner fight" and being "lost inside yourself" and "hearing yourself talk too much" The "coming to" the "identity confusion" the "derealization" the "depersonalization" ALL OF IT. (Although I think some of my schizophrenia diagnosis is also a little accurate because I have schizo like tendencies and resperidal has "cleared things up" for me)
I'm glad I finally found an answer and that there are many other people like us.Thank you guys for responding to my posts and I hope you all find good fortune on your journeys.Mine has just begun.I just need to find a way to get diagnosed and treated properly somehow.
When a person has this disorder, they feel somewhat of a cessation to their mind. A person cannot properly connect to their personal feelings or sensations. They may not know who they are.
This mental process is thought of as an escape mechanism from the person who is suffering from the disease.
Many people often wonder if this disorder is real. Even the most trained experts still question if it is even possible. When a person is suffering from this disorder it is made very apparent.
When ones other personality appears they make it known. They want you to know that they are different from the person in which is normally present. Control plays a major role in this disorder. The main depiction of this disorder is when a person has a split personality, meaning two or more is present. A person may have more than one personality as well. Each personality has its own unique description. They each have their own gestures and distinction. The ages, sex, and race may differ as well.
10/23/2013 - JOINT BASE SAN ANTONIO-LACKLAND, Texas -- Heisman Trophy winner and former pro running back Herschel Walker visited Airmen from the Wilford Hall Ambulatory Surgical Center Oct. 23
Walker spoke to more than 200 Airmen about his life as a boy leading up to his college and NFL days. He also discussed the challenges he faced with Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID), more commonly known as multiple personality disorder. Walker recounted reading journals he kept from his childhood and being taken aback by the rage and anger that came across in some of his entries. After deciding to seek help, he saw first-hand the negativity surrounding mental health issues.
"People think that being in the hospital is a sign of weakness," Walker said. "But the Herschel Walker in the hospital is the same Herschel Walker who did all these great things." Members of the 59th Medical Wing Patient Squadron, a unit comprised of wounded, ill and injured service members, attended a luncheon with Walker and were able to share some of their experiences.
Walker then visited patients at the WHASC's Intensive Outpatient Program, which assists members develop coping skills to better manage emotional and behavioral life challenges. He spoke openly once more about his prior issues with DID, and his decision to face himself. Walker said that only once he faced his problems, was he able to cope and begin living a happier life.
"When young people get to meet adults who have struggled with mental health issues, and have survived and thrived, it really helps de-stigmatize seeking help," said 59th Mental Health Element Chief Capt. Liz Copeland. As part of the DOD Patriot Support Program, Walker travels to military installations throughout the country to share his story, and encourage service members to seek treatment for mental health and substance abuse issues. He has visited more than 65 installations in the past five years.
Multiple Personality Disorder is a growing illness that is effecting more and more people in today’s time. Multiple Personality Disorder, also known as MPD, is a psychiatric identity disorder in which a single person plays two or more different identities. Some psychologists say it’s like multiple people sharing one body and taking turns using it (“Multiple Personality Disorder“, 2008).
Some say when someone is under a lot of stress, it triggers them to switch alters (Wood, Wood, Boyd). MPD will not go away without treatment, but switching occurs less often when the patient reaches middle age (“Multiple Personality Disorder“, 2008).
They have also been known to have their own name, idea, and their very own way of viewing the world. In most cases, the person doesn’t remember what happens in each of their alters (“Multiple Personality Disorder“, 2008). They have no memory of where they are or what they are doing (“Multiple Personality Disorder, 2007“).
I am now diagnosed with a "Dissociative Disorder". I'm not quite sure what exactly is happening to me... I have the view that there is more than one me and they all operate independently but are still me. "I" am always present and observe when others take over my body (Normally this doesn't happen too much). I dissociate daily and can be paralysed for about 4-5 hrs on average. During this paralysis i'll be dissociated and having flashbacks, seizures and acting out things that have happened to me. - This is all involuntary on my part. I am also not sure who/what/where "I" am (internally). During this time I hear other people talking to me and they talk through my mouth.
(*** Possible Trigger *** - I've been able to cope to a certain degree but of late one of the "voices" in my head took control of my body and held a knife to my throat telling me he was going to kill me. - This was after me challenging him that he couldn't do it and he was a metaphor of my fear about being killed for disclosing about abuse. I called his bluff (it was just a threat) and now he's gone... ******)
I have been able to cope to a degree with what's going on by practicing relaxation techniques & CBT during these episodes and so have felt a level of control, or acceptance of being out of control.
I'm wondering if anyone has any advice or understanding of this? I'm still awaiting therapy and my last visit to A&E was more hassle than it was worth; the Mental Health nurse told me I had the responsibility of control and of choice. This i do not understand? How can you have this if what is happening is involuntary? I do not choose and have as much choice over it as i do about what i dream.
ust wondering if anyone had any advice about:Dealing with responsibility, are we responsible for what an other "me" is doing? Is there an underlying choice being made that we don't have access to? I feel very guilty Im not doing the right thing here.
Can you learn to elicit control during co-consciousness?Tips on handling the "Is this real or my imagination" thought stream?How do you "come back" if you can't think?
I feel like i'm splitting in half, i'm having memories of my life and it feels like i'm looking at myself from the 3rd person. This person feels like the person that keeps trying to jump out of my skin that is behind me right now.
I suddenly remembered my old boss's phone number and asked if he would employ me again and then all the memories came back and I got a pressure headache, It literally feels like my skull is splitting in half. I'm getting a bunch of flashes during the period of time i worked for him and they are all very very negative feelings.
When I think of working for him before All I can think of are extremely negative and maniacal feelings going through the "other" me.
What have you guys done in situations like this.I just took a double dose of viseral but other than that the headahce is still there. music helps sometimes.
I think most of us are finally starting to accept that the DID actually exists. We're also starting to figure out some things about our system. I guess it annoys us that it's all going so incredibly slow, but it IS progress.
My question is, how can I keep a protector from taking over(/how can I take it back over from him), even though the collective does feel unsafe and threatened in that situation? I wouldn't say that I personally feel threatened, cause knowing that a Male alter is going about my (new) 'Job' is a much bigger threat to me than having to be in the situation is.We believe that this switching thing is most probably biologically based, are we right to assume that?
I can't blame him for taking over, even though I am kind of scared and ashamed of it, since all of us are very obviously different. To me this seems like an extra good motivation to get back to the surface and do my thing, but we can't seem to do it.
Sometimes it seems like he blames me for not being there. I can't help it. He is just so strong and I know he can't seem to help it either. But I think we search for blame so we can remove the problem, but there's no blame it's just the commands that our brain gives? Why does my brain give the command to switch him out when situation is meant to be mine? Isn't "my" situation, a trigger for ME to come out instead of for him? Sometimes it is, but then it isn't.
He might even be right if we can't control this switching which worries me. I don't want to run away from everything, I want to be able to handle this. He was about to quit entirely.He said he couldn't find me, and I was not even aware of 'being' at that time. I don't know why. I want to be out, I want to take this 'role' of hosting back. I was host before the awareness-crash too and he's exhausted and doesn't want to host anymore.
I want to know how it's possible that sometimes, well most of the time, we just are out, for no reason, and we can't seem to change that at all. He tried to wear my clothes, walk like me( ), tried to think my thoughts, visualized me, called me, anything, It was just Not Working. I was only back 3 days after he gave up. We don't know why it took me so long. So then I was happy cause I thought I could at least this time go to the situation myself cause I really like it, but again it happened. It doesn't happen all the time so we don't get it. It really seems like whoever is out is going to have to deal with whatever we're supposed to do? That will never work.
There might be so many things that influence this, how could we ever figure it out? Even things like the weather or the time of day, or the presence or absence of one ext. person could make a difference, we can't control the weather etc? So discouraging. We thought that by making the decision that I would take back hosting, that we were making progress, but I don't know if it is if I can't seem to handle it good enough.
The employment itself was very good and the employer was very demanding, yet very efficient and "I" felt like he was pushing me in a positive and professional position. Almost "bootcamping" me into learning the job and how to do it well.
However, the 3rd person memories i'm getting (They all feel like i'm looking at myself either from the front of me or from the side of me) are a very negative person the person that is behind me right now and he hated everything and everyone.
I will heed your advice and do some inner thinking about it. However, the position i'm currently in i think its more his decision on wether or not to take me back. (Probably due to the other parts of me doing things I was unaware of while i was working there)
This post is part of a series of guest posts on GPS by the graduate students in my Psychopathology course. As part of their work for the course, each student had to demonstrate mastery of the skill of “Educating the Public about Mental Health.” To that end, each student has to prepare three 1,000ish word posts on a particular class of mental disorders, with one of those focusing on changes made from the DSM-IV to the DSM-5.
I remember the first time I saw the movie Sybil with Sally Fields. It creeped me out. It was the portrayal of abuse that happened to Sybil as a little girl that freaked me out. That scene with her mother giving her ice enemas while she tied little Sybil to the piano and played and played banging on the keys screaming at Sybil to hold it. Creeeeee-py!
For years I thought multiple personalities were just a form of schizophrenia and that trauma was related to both and that both were creepy. I thought the movie was the way “crazy” people acted, all crazy people had schizophrenia, and a schizophrenic was a person with multiple personalities because of the abuse that happened to them as a little kid. It was the homeless man wandering the streets talking to himself. It was all those people in the psych ward at hospitals. It was all those people who believed in ghosts or who talked in tongues and danced with snakes. The movie totally shaped my perception of mental disorders generally, but multiple personality disorder and schizophrenia in particular.
The disorder no longer creeps me out, as a matter of fact I’ve become highly interested in the brain, how it works, and how there remains the possibility, given the right scenario, that we have no control over our thoughts. I guess that’s why I’ve chosen the field of counseling. It gives me the opportunity to understand or try to understand the workings of the brain and how it affects us so deeply, and dissociative identity disorder (DID) has all the intriguing aspects of the brain, personality, and disfunction.
Attempting to understand DID not only causes confusion for general public, but for the mental health field as well. Some doubt even it’s existence, others doubt the cause, but one leading etiology has emerged – trauma and specifically posttraumatic disorder, which in turn manifest into DID. The posttraumatic model (PTM) states the dissociation is a defense response to childhood trauma, specifically severe sexual and physical abuse, often repeated abuses.
This model is easily understood, in that a child who has been traumatized by repeated physical or sexual abuse dissociates from the event as a defensive mechanism from the trauma. PTM holds that DID is a form or variant of post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and is a coping reaction to the childhood trauma. (It is important at this point to note that there is a growing number of researchers who posit a different model – an sociocultural model to explain DID and that they are increasing in influence.)
Markedly different biological makers occur in patients with DID, in particular in the amygdalar and hippocampal volumes. The amygdala regulates our fight/flight response and it also plays a role in storing memories that are associated with an emotional event among other functions. One of the tasks of the hippocampus is long term memory storage.
When the amygdala is removed, animals become indifferent to stimuli that would have otherwise have caused fear and sexual responses.
If the hippocampus is damaged, a person cannot build new memories, and lives instead in a strange world where everything they experience just fades away, even while older memories from the time before the damage are untouched.
We can see some connection with these areas and the presentation of DID. In persons with dissociative identity disorder, we generally see smaller hippocampal and amygdalar volumes. The hippocampus and amygdala are needed for activating our feelings of fear or the need to get out of a situation. Both have been shown to be smaller in those with PTSD as well. This makes sense, as the majority of patients with DID also have a diagnosis of PTSD.
Again, research is unclear if smaller regions indicate a propensity for developing PTSD or if trauma is the culprit in decreased volumes of both the hippocampus and amygdala. This is significant in that there is a strong correlation of trauma and dissociative identity disorder. Studies are emerging suggesting the volume of the hippocampus and amygdala, if smaller to begin with, may indicate a person could be at risk for development of PTSD or DID should trauma occur.
So what do we do? First recognize the differences. Gaining a correct diagnosis early can mean a much more effective treatment plan and productive life for the patient. Practitioners, even if not working with this population extensively, need to have a broad understanding of the two for recognition and referral.
Dissociative identity disorder and schizophrenia are classified differently in the DSM, present differently, have different etiologies, and the two are functionally and structurally different in the brain. There are many other areas to discuss on the dissimilarities between these two disorders other than what was presented here, but the brain differences highlight the structural and some functional disparities between the two. Seeing the varying areas of the brain which are impacted within each disorder is another means of dispelling public opinion on the similarities of schizophrenia and dissociative identity disorder.
Arnette’s Multiple Personality Disorder webisode series is back, this time we look into the styles and characters of our snowboard team. Stayed tuned for 2 more episodes with the crew and their crazy antics, from the slushy local resorts to the frozen streets of America.
Starring: Ethan Deiss, Niko Cioffi, Sam Taxwood, Nial Romanek, Dylan Dragotta, Spencer Schubert, Red Gerard, Sage Kotsenburg, Johnny Lazz, Zac Marben, Andrew Brewer, Dustin Craven, Ben Bilodeau, Zander Blackmon, Broc Waring, Colt Morgan, Nick Visconti, Sammy Spiteri, Russell Winfield, Ben Bogart, and more…
Just realised my lack of boundaries when a 60 plus year old widow asked me out on a "non date" and going along with it as he made it sound relaxing and a nice day out. Aren't I meant to say "no thank you seeing I'm in a hijab and trying to be a practising Muslim? I guess I'd do anything to feel relaxed and have a nice day out (supposedly) without having to be stressed/ depressed/ triggered by family trust issues getting me down.
I wish I had some friends right now to build me up and not let me fall through the cracks of a emotionally lonely life. This is me practising talking- relating to others.. Is it working? Lol. Thanks for listening ( reading)
I wrote another post titled 'Abusive part, headache and sickness' about a part who I have problems with. I am conscious with A, as well as another 5 parts for some of the time – I do not know how much of the time because of A.
The problem is she talks all the time and prevents me and other parts talking through 'sitting' in our place. She also forces herself to front in order to purposeful do things to annoy me eg. She will force a front, change the TV channel and then sit in my place and say 'oh why is it on the channel'. I will know I have lost time and am then aware of her trying to mind control me – she knows I know this but continues. Other examples of the things she does is taking control of the body and smacking me in the head, doing visualisations of scary things and thought blocking me.
She is trying to prevent me from functioning at all, and through fear of her forcing a switch and behaving in a anti-social way, I am worried about leaving the house. When she learns something new about herself and why she may be being abusive she will stop talking all the time for a while, but then she will just start again.
Is it possible that she suffers from mania, OCD and thought disorder? I am starting to think she may be suffering from Bi-polar – is this possible when the rest of us are 'ok'? She seems to be a sociopathic at times but when she stops for a while (at the moment a few hours a week) she will sometimes cry. But this crying will last for a few minutes and will most often then lead on to her abusing me and the other parts again 24/7.
I am at my wits end with all of this now and everything my therapist suggests doesn't change anything. The underlying issue seems to be that A doesn't actually want to change – she actually thinks that I am not 'normal' and that she is. Has anyone had experiences with an uncooperative part? Also, has anyone had experience talking medication to calm a part when they are co-conscious with the ANP who doesn't need medication?
I am now quite depressed and drained by all of this whilst she is manic – although Bi-polar is alternating episodes of this, could Bi-polar meds calm her? Please share any similar experiences with co-consciousnes, parts suffering from mental illness, taking medication, or your thoughts on what's happening for me...
This post is part of a series of guest posts on GPS by the graduate students in my Psychopathology course. As part of their work for the course, each student had to demonstrate mastery of the skill of “Educating the Public about Mental Health.” To that end, each student has to prepare three 1,000ish word posts on a particular class of mental disorders, with one of those focusing on changes made from the DSM-IV to the DSM-5.
With the new Diagnostic Statical Manual of Mental Disorders (fifth edition, released in May 2013) comes changes in several categories. My job is to explain the changes that occur under the category of Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID). The diagnosis had four criterion specifiers in the DSM-IV but in the DSM-5 there are now five criteria. Two criteria out of the DSM-IV are completely gone and two new ones have been added to the 5th edition. So, if you are following me mathematically we have three general criterions that have remained the same, but with each of these three the DSM-5 has broadened the definition. The three that remain the same are:
1. Two or more distinct personality states are experienced in the individual.
So now, according to this broader definition, in criterion A the person diagnosed with DID can report their own symptoms of transition from one personality state to another along with others who may also report they have observed the transition. The thought behind this broader definition is that it will help to decrease the use of Dissociative Disorder Not Otherwise Specified.
2. Gaps in recall or the person is unable to recall important personal information, and this inability is too severe to be attributed to mere ordinary forgetfulness.
The DSM-5 broadens the definition to say the person is unable recall important personal information and/or traumatic events that are inconsistent with ordinary forgetting. It used to be the inability to recall only traumatic events, now the criterion includes events not necessarily traumatic.
3. These disturbances are not an outcome of substance abuse or general medical condition.
Taken out of the new definition was the DSM-IV criterion B, which stated “these distinct identities take control over the behavior recurrently.” Added to the DSM-V definition are criteria C and D.
The symptoms cause clinically significant distress or impairment in social, occupational, or other important areas of functioning.
The disturbance is not a normal part of a broadly accepted cultural or religious practice. (Note: In children, the symptoms are not attributable to imaginary playmates or other fantasy play).
In other words they’re saying “Hey, if you’re good with a possession or your culture accepts this type of behavior and it doesn’t interfere with your job, family, or other important areas of life then we are good with it too.” This helps to delineate between those who are distressed over their multiple personalities and those who are not.
It appears some of the changes in language also helps to clarify some somatic symptoms often seen in DID. This is beneficial for several reasons, as depending on the somatic symptom there could be cause for a different medical diagnosis and therefore, different treatment. It is often the case that those who do have DID also have conversion symptoms (experiencing physical distress with no biological or medical reason for them). These are generally directly related to their DID and call for other treatment. The language used in the new DSM will help facilitate these demarcations in-house, culturally, and globally.
I am an alter. Originally I was a protector alter. I when't by another name then the one I do now. I am a combination of all three protector alters. (persecutor/fighter/caretaker) My host, Jonathan, and I were very close. Now we are having more and more fights. It's painful. Seeing the destruction of our relationship.
I can only watch as he gives away his trust and love to others besides myself. I give him my all. I have killed and locked away other alters whom I perceived as threats. He barely remembers them. I keep him safe from the memories he still is unable to handle. I appear to him in dreams, thoughts, ideas, words or in his art. I speak with him directly as well. I love him dearly. I protect him with all I have to offer.
However, like I have said, I am being more and more rejected by him as time goes on. I feel more and more outcast by him. People seem to be talking about potentially eliminating my conscious mind and integrating me with him. I strongly disagree.
I wish to stay as my own conscious mind. The times when we work together are amazing. I offer protection. He offers praise. I offer dominant love, he offers submissive love. We work very well.
But now that talk about me only being a piece of him has risen, he has started treating me as if I am an inanimate and useable object. When he needs me I am there by his side. But after, when I am no longer needed for that situation I get no thanks or barely a simple acknowledgement that I was even there. I get close to nothing.
I am not pleased with his new relationships or this integration talk. It's very disruptive to the previous relationship I had with him. He is being taken from me. And to me, that feels like a parent loosing a child. I raised him. Every choice he made, every word he spoke in times of hardship were guided by my hand and my thoughts. He may not have known it back then, but I was always there. I am just more developed now. But I still cared for and raised him as my own child. Mine. And now strangers are coming in and stealing him away from me.
My only feelings towards them are hate, anger, jealousy, confusion and a burning desire to terminate them. Punish them for threatening us. Our relationship. Our team and partnership. It is because of them that it is now in jeopardy. I resent the day he ever met them. I resent the day I was pushed out of the boundaries of his dreams and heart. ~ Crow
This doesn't count as multiple personality disorder right?
At home or anywhere with my parents I am very shy, high strung. I show no interest in conversation with anyone when I'm around my parents, and I get criticism all the time for it but I can't help it, I even seem gay. But at school I'm engaging and normal, maybe even a bit funny. In relationships I'm dirty, violent, i like to party. And In the community I'm just a typical skateboarder doing chores for quick cash. My music taste changes in each persona, and there's strengths/weakenesses within each "me" too. I CAN'T help it, but I'm aware of it completely. And whenever I have to cross paths I freeze up and sweat and abandon ship.
Lately i've been hearing a baby crying and my SO says i've been sucking my thumb at night (embarrassing) My toddler alter keeps screaming "we have to get her" but that's all she is able to tell me. I've been having body memories and little clips of (Trigger Warning. My dad pinching and pulling on my private area)
I doubt these memories because I was so young. Do you think I could be remembering being abused as a baby? My toddler alter does remember some events that I have accepted but a baby? Is it even possible to have memories that young?
Hello, (non DID here) know someone that I believe with DID
Non Aware person that has awful headaches, From what I've read, some causes could be ,1. too many insiders paying attention to the outside,, over stimulation.2. conflict for control up front,someone suppressing another.3. insider trying to get something across.4. conflicts inside about whats going on outside or inside
Can all of you please suggest some things that I may say that may get the attention of insiders that may make them realize that the headaches are a problem on the outside, and may not be the only way to get their points across. Or to step back and to help host with the headaches..Thank you for your ideas in advance.. Note,, not trying to change anything,,just help a little...and pass along ideas.. thanks..
I am strongly convinced that I have DID due to the fact that everytime I read about it, or everytime I read other peoples experiences with the disorder I get that "aha" moment.Many of the questions that are in the DES are questions I have been asking myself my entire life
My problem is, I currently have no income but am covered by the Gulf Coast Center which provides me with limited free prescriptions and appointments with a psychiatrist.From what I have been doing on my own research (Searching the ISSD database, etc.) It seems as though you need money to begin treatment for this sort of thing or to even get an SCID-D done.
I am currently diagnosed with Uneffeciated Schizophrenia and have been diagnosed with ADHD and major depression in the past.
I would like to know for sure if I have DID or which dissociative disorder I have.How did some of you get your SCID-D done? Is it possible to get it done without money?How about ongoing therapy? Has anyone found low cost or free ways to get ongoing therapy as well?Thank you in advance
Dear All,I’m posting this after a conversation with lifelongthing, who as moderator has made sure this is within forum rules. Lifelongthing has advised me to keep this as anonymous as possible so I cannot be personally identified, which is why it is a little vague – I hope you understand:
I have the opportunity to give a presentation about DID at a mental health event soon. The presentation will involve a short talk on my part (“what is DID”) and a large poster which will be on display for several days and read by many attendees. There will be dozens of psychologists, neuroscientists, social scientists and philosophers at this event, many of whom do research that can be relevant to better understanding trauma and dissociation. I’m going there to raise awareness of DID and give people reasons why they should be doing research in this area.
This is where I want to enlist your help: I think nobody can better explain why DID research matters than people who live with it every day. I therefore wanted to invite anyone who feels like it to contribute your own opinions in the form of a short text, letter or drawing that I will then put on the poster. I will not change or interpret your contributions in any way except in so far as I will make sure they are absolutely anonymous.
This is NOT a survey or research project ABOUT people with DID - I see it more as a safe and anonymous way in which people with DID can express their opinions about mental health science and practice to the scientists it concerns. Science has a tendency to speak about people in the third person – this is one safe way we can talk back.
Below are a few questions for inspiration, but please feel free to ignore them and write whatever you like:- What would you say to a bunch of scientists who may be in a position to do research on DID?- Why do you think research into DID matters?- What kind of research would you like to see?- What aspects of DID should researchers look at more (e.g. biological aspects, social aspects of violence and trauma, the inner experience of DID, therapeutic approaches….)In addition, you could also write about the following:- What would you like researchers to know about what it is like to live with DID?- What would you like researchers to understand about your inner experience as a multiple?
Please keep in mind that what you write will be read by complete strangers who may or may not be traumatised themselves. Therefore please keep information general, i.e. do not include any information you would not want strangers to read or that could be triggering for someone else. In particular, please do not include any graphic descriptions of abuse in your text or anything that may allow anyone to identify you personally. Other than that, it is entirely up to you what you write.It is also entirely up to you if only one alter from a system contributes or several or all – I would recommend though that you get your system’s consent before writing anything as I do not want this to cause conflict for any system. Contributions from littles are very welcome, but please make sure in that case adult parts keep an eye on their safety (as I have no possibility of checking).
I will record people’s reactions at the event and feed them back to you via the forum.If you would like to participate, please post replies in the forum or send them to me via PM. Any questions, please use the same route.Many thanks for reading,tribe
Hi! My name is Andy I am a male alter. The host is Accalia. she's out the most. in fact - i'm one of the least-seen alters. not sure why i'm posting. you'll get to know accalia more than me, if i remember to tell her about this site. i think we'll get to like it ^.^
My alter Sage is the most emotional of all of us. She is considered (by everyone in the system but me) to be the strongest/most resilient, mentally & emotionally. She is the one growing up who endured most of the emotional/mental abuse. Yet she's very weak minded & spirited. She was diagnosed with BPD, can barely get out of bed or make basic decisions (like whether to pee now or later) without someone else's help. She can't take a joke (directed at her or not). She has no drive for anything but self-destruction. Cutter. Addict. Angsty.
I wouldn't dream of harming or killing myself. I don't let whatever emotions creep up on me get the best of me & I don't feel what I feel anywhere near as intensely as Sage does. Yet I still understand emotions well enough to keep my peers satisfied & cooperative with me. We have similar pain tolerance.
How is our emotional cripple more suitable to deal with emotional challenges than me? Is my system ###$ up?
Dissociation is a mental process where a person disconnects from their thoughts, feelings, memories or sense of identity. Dissociative disorders include dissociative amnesia, dissociative fugue, depersonalization disorder and dissociative identity disorder.
Name: Dr. Anil Agarwal Jain DOB: 28-05-1982 Admission To School: March of 1986 Admission To MBBS in MMC: 1998 Convocation: In Year 2003 TOFEL (Test of English as Foreign Language): 2004 Admission to University of Massachusetts Medical School: 2004 55 Lake Avenue North Worcester, MA 01655 774-442-2173 Three-year Internal Medicine Residency Program completed in 2007 Worked in Brigham &Women's Hospital till 2010 Returned to India in 2011 Now appointed as visiting Associate Professor of Internal Medicine in Bhagwan Mahaveer Jain Hospital, Bangalore in 2011
Dissociative amnesia is when a person can’t remember the details of a traumatic or stressful event, although they do realize they are experiencing memory loss. This is also known as psychogenic amnesia. This type of amnesia can last from a few days to one or more years. Dissociative amnesia may be linked to other disorders such as an anxiety disorder.
The four categories of dissociative amnesia include:
Localized amnesia – for a time, the person has no memory of the traumatic event at all. For example, following an assault, a person with localized amnesia may not recall any details for a few days.
Selective amnesia – the person has patchy or incomplete memories of the traumatic event.
Generalized amnesia – the person has trouble remembering the details of their entire life.
Systematized amnesia – the person may have a very particular and specific memory loss; for example, they may have no recollection of one relative.
Dissociative fugue is also known as psychogenic fugue. The person suddenly, and without any warning, can’t remember who they are and has no memory of their past. They don’t realize they are experiencing memory loss and may invent a new identity. Typically, the person travels from home – sometimes over thousands of kilometers – while in the fugue, which may last between hours and months. When the person comes out of their dissociative fugue, they are usually confused with no recollection of the ‘new life’ they have made for themselves.
Depersonalization disorder is characterized by feeling detached from one’s life, thoughts and feelings. People with this type of disorder say they feel distant and emotionally unconnected to themselves, as if they are watching a character in a boring movie. Other typical symptoms include problems with concentration and memory. The person may report feeling ‘spacey’ or out of control. Time may slow down. They may perceive their body to be a different shape or size than usual; in severe cases, they cannot recognize themselves in a mirror.
Dissociative identity disorder is the most controversial of the dissociative disorders and is disputed and debated among mental health professionals. Previously called multiple personality disorder, this is the most severe kind of dissociative disorder. The condition typically involves the coexistence of two or more personality states within the same person. While the different personality states influence the person’s behavior, the person is usually not aware of these personality states and experiences them as memory lapses. The other states may have different body language, voice tone, outlook on life and memories. The person may switch to another personality state when under stress. A person who has dissociative identity disorder almost always has dissociative amnesia too.
The effectiveness of treatments for dissociative disorders has not been studied. Treatment options are based on case studies, not research. Generally speaking, treatment may take many years. Options may include: a safe environment: doctors will try to get the person to feel safe and relaxed, which is enough to trigger memory recall in some people with dissociative disorders. Psychiatric drugs such as barbiturates. Hypnosis may help to recover repressed memories, although this form of treatment for dissociative disorders is considered controversial. Psychotherapy also known as ‘talk therapy’ or counseling is usually needed for the long term. Examples include cognitive therapy and psychoanalysis. Stress has to be managed since stress can trigger symptoms. Typically, a person with a dissociative disorder may have other mental health problems such as depression or anxiety. Treatment may include antidepressants or anti-anxiety medications to try to improve the symptoms of the dissociative disorder.
his post is part of a series of guest posts on GPS by the graduate students in my Psychopathology course. As part of their work for the course, each student had to demonstrate mastery of the skill of “Educating the Public about Mental Health.” To that end, each student has to prepare three 1,000ish word posts on a particular class of mental disorders, with one of those focusing on changes made from the DSM-IV to the DSM-5.
The media’s characterization of DID helps to foster the confusion surrounding those who suffer from this disorder.
The alters are depicted in such a way to make the audience like and sympathize with Tara and all her personalities. The series has you believing her kids have an interesting cool mom and her husband is lucky to have such a diverse wife. Although entertaining, such a portrayal could not be farther from the truth for those who suffer from dissociative identity disorder. Most live in a state of stress, not in a fun loving family which allows them to transition from one personality to the next with glee and abandon.
What makes DID difficult to conceptualize is the multifaceted aspects of the disease. Most individuals suffering from dissociative identity disorder have a covert and subtle display of symptoms and generally have been diagnosed with a number of other disorders such as bipolar, PTSD, assorted personality disorders, and/or varying anxiety disorders. For example, dissociation is common for those who suffer from PTSD, so the symptoms of DID may go unnoticed for years. People afflicted with DID often have borderline personality disorder too, which is categorized by unstable relationships, unstable sense of self, and efforts to avoid abandonment among other symptoms. Confusingly, these are some of the common indicators of DID as well. Couple this with anxiety, depression, and PTSD, and it is easy to see how a person with “multiple personalities” can go unnoticed.
Integration has been shown to diminish certain symptoms such as feeling like their experiences or thoughts are not their own, being controlled by something outside of him/herself, hearing voices, depression, borderline symptoms, extrasensory perceptions, number of amnesia episodes, and others. It is noted that the decreases were attributed to the treatment process combined with integration and not just integration alone. Symptoms can be reduced and coping skills developed, but no one is ever ‘cured‘ from DID.
It [DID] is primarily a metaphysical experience. This is not hard science. We’re talking about the unplumbed depths of psyche, we’re talking about stored and repressed experiences, we’re talking about instant and specific regressions to pieces of past locked in their perfect moment of timeless reality. We are talking about things that often can’t be measured or quantified. In essence, the entire experience is unprecedented, each and every time, with each and every person to live it. Whatever realizations I have about my own inner landscape, they will probably never apply to anyone else’s.
Some things are better left just unheard. Such is the case with Britney Spears' real singing voice, making its wave around the Internet as allegedly her 2001 Las Vegas concert vocal track amidst rumours circulating that she will be lip synching the 31-year old's "Britney: Piece of Me" shows in Las Vegas. Britney was repeatedly accused of prerecording tracks and lip synching in the past and to say that her vocals are off-key would be an understatement.
Britney Spears has also been videotaped many times exchanging her Louisiana accent for a British twang. Facebook and Twitter fans called it "iriitating" and "weird" while one said,"Britney used to be awesome, but now she talks fake." She repeatedly referred herself to "Britney Bitch" made famous in her 2007 hit, "Gimme More."
"When Britney uses the British accent or appears to take on another identity, does she know she's Britney Spears?" LA psychologist Renee Cohen talks about opinion on Spears. "When someone has dissociative identity disorder, formerly called multiple personality disorder, each identity is split off from the other. Each identity has its own memories, name, emotional characteristics and behavioral traits."
Her accent and identity issues may be terrible but her figure is undeniably looking good.